


i think you're really beautiful

by tordze



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Angst, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-15 07:03:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21249371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tordze/pseuds/tordze
Summary: you said you were crying over him.//kokichi wasn't stupid.no, not at all; he wasn't oblivious, no matter how much blissful ignorance he projected to the world around him, he could read the air, and he could certainly read people.and of course, he could read those who he'd spent hours studying.





	i think you're really beautiful

**Author's Note:**

> super sorry if this is ooc. its based on happiness + i think you're really beautiful by starry cat ... kind of based on kinny shit haha
> 
> expect more kiibouma from me soon i'm on a writing spree tonite

kokichi wasn't stupid. 

no, not at all; he wasn't oblivious, no matter how much blissful ignorance he projected to the world around him, he could read the air, and he could certainly read people.

and of course, he could read those who he'd spent hours studying.

over the past few weeks, he could tell something was wrong with kiibo. something was not right; it troubled him, but what could he do? why would kiibo talk to the likes of him? kokichi had formed an idea of himself in the minds of all those around him. he was one-dimensional, funny at best and insensitive and brash at worst. all he would ever be to his friends was the clown; there was no room between them for any sort of depth to grow.

it hurt, sometimes. but he didn't know how to revoke the surface kokichi he'd shown to those around him.

still, it was worth a shot. if anyone was earnest and trusting, it was kiibo. maybe kokichi was lucky in that regard; maybe it meant something bigger, but it was probably just wishful thinking. 

hesitantly, kokichi raised a pallid hand to knock on the door of kiibo's dorm room. 

there was silence all around him, all except in his head.

_maybe i should just go…_

as soon as he had turned to leave, the door creaked open softly. "what is it?" kiibo asked, sounding monotone and drained. kokichi held back his initial reaction of concern and surprise. 

"ah, kiiboy- uh, kiibo!" kokichi exclaimed, trying to put on his usual grin (it quavered, but neither of them acknowledged it.) as he tucked his arms behind his head. "i just wanted to check up on you… you left lunch early, an' i've never seen you do that before, so…"

the heavy, nearly suffocating silence crushed his throat and cut him off.

kiibo blinked his bleary eyes, letting out a quiet, defeated sigh. 

"what are you really here for? i'm not in the mood."

ouch. fuck. 

_i knew he wouldn't…_

"hey, i'm being serious! it kind of hurts my feelings that you don't think i can care about you, you know?" he put on an exaggerated pout, but the tension in his throat was all but an act. 

kiibo closed his eyes, rubbing the bridge of his nose and sighing. kokichi wondered if he could get headaches, but bit his tongue. now wasn't really the time. 

"come in."

kokichi silently obeyed.

-

"just tell me why you came here. i'm kind of dealing with some stuff." kiibo's tone hadn't changed from the jaded one he'd greeted kokichi with. it made a cold feeling coil in his guts. kiibo wasn't himself. 

"...that's why i'm here." kokichi felt his vocal cords tightening painfully.

_no. not now. i…_

he swallowed (almost flinching at how tense and achy it was), trying to continue.

"i saw… you… you left early, and… you looked upset. and you're…" kokichi absently reached up to chew on the end of his sleeve. "...you're my friend, so… that's what friends do."

kiibo glanced up at him, head still hung low. "...am i really?"

kokichi blinked, rubbing his upper arm and glancing at the carpet. he rubbed the toe of his worn-out boot along the carpet. "yeah."

"are you sure?" 

"why wouldn't i be, stupid?" a bit of kokichi's biting humor came out, but there was no joviality to it. toxins dripped from his words. "you don't know what i think of you."

"no, i don't, but i'm not _stupid_." kiibo spat the poison coldly back at kokichi, glancing away from him. he folded his legs calmly, closing his eyes and continuing. "besides, aren't i just a stupid robot?"

kokichi was at a loss for words for a second; after all, since when would kiibo parrot that sort of stuff? usually he jumped on kokichi for even the slightest joke about his nature. it was… so alien, so foreign…

"...no? you're… i dunno, you're your own person. i just like to mess around, i don't mean any of that stuff i say…"

"you can say that all you want, but i know that's what everyone here thinks." kiibo glanced up at kokichi, his electric blue eyes burning him up. "...that's all they say about me."

silent, kokichi looked at kiibo. 

_maybe i should just let him talk. i'd fuck it up anyway, and my throat is already so tight…_

as he'd hoped, kiibo continued.

"i mean, no one here sees me as one of their peers. everyone only sees me as a tool, a machine, a…" he inhaled sharply, clutching the metal plates on the sides of his head and averting his gaze sharply. "a _thing_." his voice was barely above a whisper, but kokichi heard more emotion in his voice than he'd ever heard in any human's. 

kokichi put a shaking hand on the android's shoulder, before nearly recoiling upon feeling how hot he was. it was abnormal, but…

well, probably to be expected from how stressed he'd been.

"...i don't think of you that way, who's saying all that shit? tell me an' i'll go fuck 'em up." 

"no you won't. stop joking around with me." kiibo's voice sounded wet, teary and heavy. it made kokichi's chest heavy, in a weird sort of way. he wanted to wrap his arms around him, to comfort him and be there for him, but… ah, that was weird, wasn't it?

"i'm not joking. i wanna know who said all that to you. you usually don't let this shit get to you, that's why i joke with you so often." kokichi was quiet, and so was his android companion. "...you know, i've figured out when to stop by now, so… what's gotten into you?"

silence.

"is it something i did?"

silence.

"i'm sorry."

"..." kiibo sighed, rubbing fervently at his eyes. "...it's not you."

kokichi chewed his lip anxiously. "well… i guess you don't _have_ to tell me. just… you can, if you wanted to. i'm your friend, and shit. i'm here for you, and all that dumb sappy shit."

"it's… shuichi."

_of course._

kokichi held his tongue. "what did he say?"

"he told me what everyone says about me. i know they weren't trying to be rude, but… he told me that i should know, and i…" the android's eyes grew shiny, his digital irises quavering around the edges like runny paint off a canvas. "he told me he didn't want to be with me anymore, because i'm not… real." he ducked his head, folding his arms over his chest. "he said it felt fake."

kokichi felt fire burning inside of his guts. he already knew what probably went down; of course shuichi didn't mean it crudely, but… it's hard to dance around a topic like that. he knew how it probably went down, but it didn't stop him from feeling like a pissed off guard dog. 

_not like you have any room to judge. you're a bitch to him all the time._ anger traded out with guilt, and the fire inside of him froze into an icy pit. 

"...you're not fake." kokichi mumbled. "not to me."

"but i am to him."

those five words shot through his heart like a sick cupid's arrow. 

_and that's all that matters._

-

"well.. thanks for listening, kokichi. i'm gonna talk to shuichi tomorrow, because he probably didn't mean to upset me… i just need some time to think about this. i guess i do have a right to know what people are saying about me anyway…" kiibo gave a half-hearted goodbye wave to kokichi as he walked off to his own dorm.

"oh. i hope things work out. see-ya, kiiboy. i'm gonna go do something more fun than hang around with... " he trailed off, freezing. his usual teasing… _really_ wouldn't go over well right now. "...such a sad sack as you are. aha…" it fell flat, but kiibo gave him a half-smile that made his chest crack and flutter.

-

kokichi lay on the floor beside his bed, staring half-lidded at the ceiling. he had his hands folded on his stomach, earbuds burrowed deep into his ears. unintelligible no-fi played through his headphones. he could almost swear he felt it coursing in his veins.

he gave a slow blink at the ceiling.

*ding!*

kokichi absently glanced at the pop-up notification on his phone.

_kiiboy: [5:32 P.M.] shuichi and i are talking it out now!! thank you for staying with me, kokichi. he told me he just messed up what he said. you were right._

he blinked, expression blank and solemn.

_he doesn't notice all the little things about you like i do._

_but i bet he's so much kinder than i am. he really didn't mean it, did he?_

_whatever. it can't take back what the rest of them said about you._

_oh_ god, _i wish i was him so badly._

kokichi rubbed at his eyes, huffing out a laugh.

_kokoochie: [5:35 P.M.] lol good for u i don give a shit abt ur luv life kiiboy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! glad ur feeling better though i guess_

he locked his phone, tossing it to the side.

_i guess all i could do is wish._


End file.
